“i started working at byerly’s a few weeks ago. my manager thinks i look like Justin Bieber so he insitsts on telling every customer “you know we’ve got Justin Bieber working here”…every time a customer tells me I look like him [Bieber] i die a little inside.”

“Last summer I worked as a camp counselor for 3rd-5th graders. I though it would be pretty fun. But the first day a kid took a shit on the floor. That set the tone for the rest of the summer.”

“So here I am serving customers at KFC and this woman asks: “How many pieces of chicken do I get in a 21 piece pack?” When I tell her its 21 she then asks: “How much is the 9 pieces for $9.95” So I just walk away because I can’t.”

“The other day at a restaurant I work at, the phone rang and I answered it. We have a standard greeting we must say each time the phone rings and it is “Thank you for calling Mimi’s Cafe, where we serve breakfast lunch and dinner seven days a week. This is Frank. How may I help you?” As soon as I finish the women on the line says, “yes, uh are you guys open for breakfast?”

“I’m in afghanistan. Your job > my job”

“I work at the Grab n’ Go at my University. One day while restocking the store I went to ask my supervisor if I could go on break. The next thing I see is this 60 year old woman bent over with her white thong sticking out of her pants. So gross.”

“I work at a dry cleaners and people love to leave little surprises in their pocket for you. Like, used tissue paper, used condoms, half way chewed gum. Not to mention any of the little “accidents” they so left behind. But one day, checking pockets. There was a mini vibrator in a pocket that was not clean. Let me just say, every time you drop your clothes off and you leave a few bucks in your pockets, it’s going straight into my wallet.”

“I’ve heard some pretty bad jobs on here. But I don’t think anyone can top standing in a gorilla suit in 105 degree Arizona weather while waiving a sign around announcing 50% off your second ticket at the local zoo. The kicker: I made about $6.00 an hour.”

“I work at a Chuck E Cheese. I watched a little girl steal about 50 tokens out of a box we keep (not very well) hidden. Then she told me that a machine ate 7 tokens. I told her to stop putting tokens into a machine if 1 doesn’t make it work. Then she started crying?”

“I work at a Korean restaurant and I had a customer complain to me about our inability to make Chinese food for fifteen minutes straight.”

“I finally got a raise after almost 3 years of working my tail off. After a weekend of celebrating I came back Monday to find out I had been fired for not clocking out.”

“I worked in a lumber yard at a hardware store. A customer bought some propane, so they sent it over the radio to notify me that my services were needed to fill the tank. I was at the opposite side of the yard, so it took a couple of minutes to get to the propane tank. The guy immediately starts screaming at me for waiting so long, said “you’re an effing idiot an will never make anything of yourself because you’re a propane jockey” (whatever that means). I was getting my masters in business at the time btw. As he’s walking away he turns to an elderly lady that was in the parking lot and said “what’s with these effing idiots?” The lady came up to me and said “that was the minister at my parish…..”

“I was about to leave for work one day when this new show that I was yet to see an episode of came on the TV. I ended up leaving half an hour later than usual because I had to watch it. The show was so good that it was worth the shit storm of trouble I was in when I finally showed up to work. It was The College Humor Show, and I am currently employed as a police officer in Australia.”

“I just had a customer call for tech support on how to spell Google.”

“I worked at a popular franchise restaurant and came up with some of the greatest excuses known to man or woman for being late. Of the best was one day when I came in for a shift and had missed the 8 am meeting. The manager came to me and said “You’d better have a damned good reason for missing the meeting the morning.” I told him with a straight face ” Sir. I woke up this morning duct taped to a lawn chair. It took me to 9 to work out of the tape. I got here as soon as possible.” The guy never looked at me the same again.”