Our turtle friend is obviously looking for the 8 Animal-Based Sex Positions Other Than Doggy Style.

He’s tired of using his only move: Turtle Style 

(Source: youtube.com)

Animals Give You Tough Love

No pain, no cuddling.

(Source: youtube.com)

Turtle Wave

It’s nice to get out of your shell once in a while.

(Source: b3ta.com)

The 12 Days of Internet Christmas [Click to read full article]

Turtles High-Fiving

Turtle Power!

(Source: reddit.com)

Turtle Bullies Dog

This a real issue, with real consequences. Like the dog pooping on the carpet.

(Source: gifs.tastefullyoffensive.com)

Turtle Pushes Other Turtle into Water

Looks like Leonardo and Donatello have some unresolved issues.

Surprised Turtle Caught Off Guard

Mmm, girl, dat shell.

(Source: reddit.com)

“Mario Kart”

Here we go.

(Source: youtube.com)

Krang Painted on Pregnant Woman

I hope this kid likes ’80s stuff.

(Source: reddit.com)

Hardcore Turtle Just Wants Lettuce

So stay the F*CK OUTTA HIS WAY.

(Source: youtube.com)

Dog Scared of Tortoise

This slow and steady thing is really working out for him.

(Source: 4gifs)

(Source: College Humor)

Chicken Riding a Tortoise

Dreams do come true—especially if you’re a remarkably strange person.

(Source: College Humor)

Woman Excites Entire Tortoise

Fact: Tortoises are hung like tortoises.

(Source: College Humor)