"It’s not a lie if YOU believe it." Peter Pan or George Constanza
How To Totally NAIL Internet Haters [Click for the last 2 TIPS - Free of charge]
Why ignore internet commenters when you can just constantly furiously respond to them?
Well, I DEFINITELY put in enough money. My burger was $9.50 and I put in $10. That’s MOREthan I owe. Oh, right, I guess there’s tax and tip. I guess I can put in ONE more dollar. Are we good now? Yes, I did have some of the “Uncle Jack’s Giant Plate of $15 nachos.” You know what, just to make things easier on everyone, I’ll put in ANOTHER dollar. That’s two dollars more than I owe. I’m definitely covered now. What? Yeah, I had some beer from the pitcher. What’s your point? Alright, alright, I’m only doing this because I’m sooooo generous…
ONE. MORE. … DOLLAR. And that’s it. I’ve already done too much.
The 7 People You’re Always Splitting the Bill With [Click for more]
6 Life Hacks for Incredibly Lazy People [Click for the last 2]
Make your already-too-easy life even easier.
Step 1: Don’t buy your Herpecin cream at the same time.
Always give it 100%, unless it’s the tip.
PayPal is also accepted.
Sure, but when I hand out roses to 10-year-old girls suddenly it’s creepy?
How to Write Bestselling Erotic Fiction [Click for all your “How To” tips]
Erotic fiction is all the rage these days — and if you’re anything like me, your first response to this trend is, “No thanks,” and your second is, “But wait — can I cash in on that?!” Well, you are in luck! I am here to tell you that writing high-quality smut is as easy as I heard you were in high school. Tramp.
There are several important guidelines to follow when writing straight-up filthy filth for the masses. Keep these simple points in mind, and in no time at all you’ll be on board the gravy train that is the growing erotic fiction market. Just don’t think about the gravy too much. Let’s get started.
The 13 Most Convincing Tip Jars Ever [Click for more]
Here’s a tip: Don’t be cheap!
The Brutally Honest Restaurant Tip Calculator [Click for more]
Can we split this article up 4 ways? We all forgot to bring cash.
The Troll: Subway, Tips, and Punxsutawney Phil [Click for more]
How to Live Life on Expert Mode [Click for more tips]
Turn your office into YOUR OFFICE.