“Hey remember when I asked you if you had seen my digitial camera and you said no. Well I found it in your room. So remember when school ended and you asked me if I had seen your calculator, calculus book, as well as your engineering economics book, I sold them and actually got about $300 bucks for them all and that mysterious phone tip that the cops got about where you guys smoked pot at, it was me as well. Don’t light a fire you can’t put out.. DOUCHE”

“One time in grade 8 my class was doing a group reading project where we all read an article about something in a textbook together. This article was about bubble gum. One part was mentioning the biggest bubble ever blown was 20 inches across. In the textbook it actually says and I quote:”I bet you’ve blown some pretty big ones yourself but you’ve never blown one that big!” The whole class including the teacher laughed at that for 10 minutes after that and one kid pissed his pants laughing so hard.”