Great. Thanks, Patton. Now we all have that clap.
You should see how they did “Gangnam Style”.
19-year-old son stumbles in and flops onto the toilet
Toilet Wall: Code Red, everyone. Code Red!
Mirror Wall: He just stuffed a Chipotle bag in the trash. We’re in this for the long haul, boys.
Son: Ugh, leave me alone! I need to concentrate.
Picture Wall: Then don’t start playing Tiny Wings this time. Last time you were here for half an hour.
Mirror Wall: We nearly died of suffocation.
Son: This is my bathroom and I’ll take however long I want.
Toilet Wall: At least give us a courtesy flush.
Son: Just give me a little privacy.
Picture Wall: I have an idea. Have your dad build an outhouse in the backyard. Win-win.
Son: It’s the middle of the winter. I’d freeze to death.
Mirror Wall: Better than suffocating to death.
Son: Look, no one’s enjoying this. But the sooner you quit bugging me the faster I’ll be.
Toilet Wall: He has us cornered. Radio silence, fellas.
2 minutes later
Picture Wall: The smell. It’s… it’s seeping into my drywall. [Keep Reading]
Least sexy thing you could have possibly ever done, ever? That sounds like a challenge to me.
Will we ever truly know the answer….Well, yes, because people can’t be grills…or can they. No, no they can’t.
What Your Text Says vs. What I See [Click to continue reading]
“My ex-boyfriend played the saxophone, which he always abbreviated as “sax”. So we’d often be texting in the morning when he’d say he had to go to his “sax lesson” which autocorrect always, without fail, changed to “sex lesson”. I always wished him good luck and told him I appreciated the effort he was putting into the relationship.”
“Procrastination is a dish best served cold…after leaving it on the counter for 4 hours after cooking it”
Her dad replied, “LOL, it’s fine. Could use some tending to by your mother LOL.”
Seriously, the dog was tearing it apart all morning.