How to Get Hired By Seeming Like a Serial Killer [Click for more]

Welcome to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. If your job sucks too then submit your story to us on Tumblr and it might be featured in the next column.

I work for Comcast as an installer, one of my duties is disconnecting cable. I disconnected a guy on Superbowl Sunday right before the game, I could see his living room with a flat screen set up and cars lining the street for a party. A minute before kick off, I pulled the wire, before I could get down the pole, the guy comes out with a gun shooting at me. I got the hell out of there and called the cops. - Anonymous

So some kid kept on asking her mom to get her candy while I was at work today. When they came by to check out, the mom asked me, “You are so skinny. What do you eat usually?” I answered, “Spinach. Lots of spinach.” The look on her kid’s face was priceless. - Anonymous

I work at a restaurant where we pass out pagers when your food is ready. A mother and young boy ordered their food and the boy kept reaching up. The mother handed him the pager and said “He always enjoys playing with my vibrator.” My eyes got wide as I tried not to laugh. Then she said “uh I mean buzzer thingy” and made a bee line for the drink station. - Anonymous - Continue reading

The Saddest & Happiest Moment from the SuperBowl

8 Touchdown Dances for Other Situations [Click for more]

Predicting The Best Super Bowl Commercials Before They Air [Click for full article]

Car. Driving fast. Driving on a racetrack past scientists who drop their clipboards, because who knew Car could drive THIS fast? Not even scientists knew that.

Other Car. Driving fast. Driving on a curvy road in a foreign country. Who knew Other Car could drive THIS fast in THIS foreign of a country.

A dreary cityscape. Shot in black and white. A flock of unremarkable birds flies away. Even they have no use for this city. We don’t see the birds, because we were blind to this decline. There is a stark beauty to this. All of a sudden the commercial remembers it’s a commercial and the last five seconds are about Reinforced-Seal Sandwich Bags. Continue

8 Touchdown Dances for Other Situations [Click for more dances]

Dance like the Ref isn’t watching.

Pornhub’s Rejected Super Bowl Commercial

Love is real. But who cares.

(Source: reddit.com)

Any Given Puppy Bowl

Clear eyes, full barks, can’t lose.

Screencap: Superbowl

So…does that mean you have an extra ticket, or…?

(Source: College Humor)

Budweiser Good

From the makers of Bud Platinum comes a new variation of Bud: Budweiser Good. “We’re trying.”

(Source: College Humor)

The Best of Sad Tom Brady

Our favorite pictures of Sad Keanu’s new best friend.

(Source: College Humor)

(Source: )

Sketch: Atheist Football Player

He’s never thrown a Hail Mary.

Seinfeld Superbowl Commercial

It’s not quite another season of the sitcom, but it’s better than a clipshow episode.