“I had been looking for a new mattress and I had had trouble finding one I liked. There was one I was interested in that I knew a local Hilton hotel happened to have in their rooms. I asked my Dad if I could spend a night there to try the mattress. So, he booked a room and called my boyfriend: “I’m calling to ask if you would be willing to spend the night with my daughter in a in a Hilton hotel so she won’t be alone.” My boyfriend said he never thought he would hear such a request from his girlfriend’s father. I ended up buying that mattress.
- Christina Q.”
“My long distance boyfriend of 7 years decided this past June that as a birthday present to me, he would come to the US and meet me for the first time and we would spend a week together. I decided I wanted us to meet at a lake in town that I always thought was a nice spot to walk and relax after work a few years ago. I arrived and discovered that during the afternoon in the summer months is apparently when all the irresponsible dog owners and hobos hang out there now, too. We met and instead of the romantic, quiet setting I was hoping for spent our short time there dodging dog excrement every 30ft or so and bunches of half-naked homeless men baking in the Florida sun. The week went well but he discovered when I drove him to the airport that it’s situated next to a sewage treatment plant since the wind was blowing in the wrong direction. Our ‘romantic’ week together ended as it began, smelling like shit. Tallahassee, you are so fucking embarrassing it isn’t even funny.
“I have a bit of a thing with popping pimples, especially the really gross pussy ones. My boyfriend knows this because I often ask if I can pop his to which he always says no because “it hurts too much”. Once when he came to visit we had a really huge argument but because there was nowhere else for him to sleep we still shared the bed. When he crawled into bed he rolled over with over with his back facing me and sheepishly offered to let me pop his pimples to make up for being an idiot.
One time while with my now ex i got a call from my mother. I answered the phone and started talking, but was soon distracted by the sound of my zipper being pulled down. My ex then proceeded to suck me off while I attempted to finish the call. From then on, whenever my mom called, she would give me head. To this day I try not to think about the freudian implications.
(Source: College Humor)
Welcome to Rough Love, the column where we share your craziest, funniest, most embarrassing dating related stories. If you think you can top this batch of rough loving, submit your story straight to our Tumblr inbox.
I usually despise the women’s magazines my girlfriend reads, with the lame tips about men and personal surveys — they never lead to anything worthwhile. However, I just received this text message from her: “I just took a sex quiz- and apparently I need to spice it up. If we have that 3some I get 5 points!” I suddenly have a change of heart and I am considering getting her a permanent, lifetime subscription to Cosmo, Glamour, Women’s Health, and any others I can come across.
- Allen H
Rough Love: If She Knows Star Wars, It’s True Love [Click for more]
Last night my wife and I were fixing supper and I casually asked her if she liked her bacon crunchy or chewy? Without pause she replied “Graaaaaarahhhaaaaaaaa” (*Wookiee Noise). I am ashamed to admit she as never seen a single Star Wars episode… all her knowledge of the force she has merely picked up in reference from me. The fact she associated chewy bacon with Chewbacca….. I have never loved her more. - J Larry
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I showed my girlfriend a picture of a caterpillar, and commented on its ugly coloration, black with yellow spots. She replied “Ugh, I hate animals with spots… Except for zebras!” She’s a law student.
My boyfriend has forced me to go see every twilight movie so far, he cant wait for the next one. he honestly cant see how terrible they are, and it is torture watch them T.T i now know the pain of every guy unfortunate enough to have a girlfriend who likes twilight.
One night while fooling around with my boyfriend, I was sitting naked on top of him giving him a hand job and he told me to talk dirty to him. As I was talking the dirtiest I could, I farted… on top of him…
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Rough Love: Girls Aren’t Cows [Click for full post]
I had an ex-boyfriend who though girls lactated constantly. No, we are not cows.
One weekend me and my girlfriend were supposed to have hours of alone time at her house. Almost immediately after getting there her parents came home early to drop off some stuff before they went back out. I spent the next couple hours under a blanket in her closet while her little brother snuck me rice krispies and capri suns
My ex girlfriend once asked me when Cinco de Mayo was…. hence… “ex”
Happy veintiuno de junio! To celebrate send us your Rough Love stories. You can submit them right on Tumblr.
Rough Love: It’s So Big! The Spider, I Mean [Click for full post]
So after doing it tonight my wife is washing up in the bathroom and I come in to pee. I pull it out and here her excitedly say “it’s so big, it’s so big.” “I’m like ya baby it sure is hope you liked it” and then realize she’s actually freaking out because a huge spider ran across the floor. There we go.
My on/off again boyfriend, of 5 years, and I never really did anything that was romantic. So I honestly was tickled pink when he msged me in WoW to meet him in Dalaran on Valentine’s day. He shared the ‘Romantic Picnic’ with me. He surprised me with it again the next year and it made me just as happy as the first time.
My boyfriend, every so often, wakes me up in the middle of the night by kissing me or sticking his hands down my pants on a quest for a blowjob. I don’t really mind this, but it is absolutely hilarious to discuss it with him the next day since he doesn’t remember. He does it at least once every month and it’s become a big talking point between his roommates and us. He’s also very proud of the fact that he is fully capable of getting a blowjob out of me while he is asleep. 6 times now.
Can you run game in your sleep? If so then submit your “Rough Love” stories to our Tumblr inbox. We read everything!
While fooling around in her basement, my girlfriend asked me to “touch her belly button” and was astounded that I didn’t know that “if you touch a girl’s belly button, she can feel it ‘down there.’” Needless to say, I fingered her bely button — hard. After faking it for a solid minute, she fell off the couch nearly in tears, and laughing. Sadly, I didn’t realize it was a joke,alize it was a joke, yet, and proceeded to apologize if I had hurt her while frantically asking what I did wrong so I didn’t make the same mistake next time. It was a decent story until she told her room mates.
Rough Love: Hey, Girlfriend’s Mom and Girlfriend’s Dad![Click for more]
I never figured out what to call my girlfriend’s parents. No Mr and Mrs ____, no first names, just never figured it out. Decided I’d just go with the whole make eye contact and start talking thing. I did this for nine years. They didn’t notice until I brought it up during my speech at our wedding.
My boyfriend and I realized we both lost our virginity, to each other, watching Grandma’s Boy while high.
If you have a more magical story on how you lost your virginity (not possible) then send it to our Tumblr inbox.
I told my girlfriend that I thought waking up to a blow job would be the greatest thing ever. Sure enough, a few weeks later I woke up to what I thought was her licking my sack. I kept my eyes closed and pretended I was still sleeping. A minute later I heard her laughing but the licking continued. I opened my eyes and her dog was in between my legs… She was watching the whole time and decided not to tell me. Glad she thought it was hilarious, because I’m scarred.
One night, me and my boyfriend were hanging out on my bed talking and eating m&m’s. After awhile we started going at it, and when we were finished I sat up and he got a grossed out look on his face and said “ewww babe, what’s all over your back?!” Turns out we had dropped a couple m&m’s and they had melted and squished underneath us.
The other day my girlfriend and I were hanging out and as always things began to get heated after a little while. We were both really horny so I reached my hand down her pants and started feeling around. Jeans are pretty tough to explore, being so tight, but her parents were home, so I couldn’t take them off. I finally slipped a finger inside of her and she whispers “that’s my butt”. We both burst out laughing. Definitely a keeper.
Like many couples on here, my boyfriend and I have lick fights, tickle fights (he always wins those, and initiates them, since I squeak and flail when tickled), and the usual not-so-weird couple things. I’m pretty sure his thing about sticking things up my nose it pretty unique though.
I personally like being slightly choked w/ a hand while having sex, doggy style.
Don’t be scared… be like Shay and submit your RoughLove stories to our Tumblr inbox. The rougher the better as long as the mood is right.