Follow Us

CollegeHumor Staff Blog

And the best part is — it’s totally discreet!

And the best part is — it’s totally discreet!

Now You Can Be the Proud Owner of a Masturbation Hut
And the best part is - it’s totally discreet!

Now You Can Be the Proud Owner of a Masturbation Hut

And the best part is - it’s totally discreet!

Somebody Took A Mormon Anti-Masturbation Video And Set It To 50 Cent. And It Works.

I hope you don’t plan on being productive for the rest of the day, because the internet is about to muck that up. 

First things first, Jehovah’s Witnesses do not want people to be jerking it, especially deaf people. Probably because the risk of somebody walking in on them is even greater, and that’s just going to be awkward for everyone. (There’s no telling how many times Annie Sullivan walked in on Helen Keller mid-diddle…)

Second, Mr. Stormeh dubbed 50 Cent’s “In Da Club” over the anti-masturbation video and what we have is your new go-to dance for any social event from here on out. Watch the video

The 7 Sexiest Abstinence PSAs to Jerk It To [Click to start wacking it]
'The Situation' and Bristol Palin Talk Sex

The 7 Sexiest Abstinence PSAs to Jerk It To [Click to start wacking it]

'The Situation' and Bristol Palin Talk Sex

(Source: College Humor)

10 Songs You Won’t BELIEVE Are About Masturbation [Click for full playlist]
Inside the secret filthy minds of The Beatles, The Eagles, and every classical composer ever! 

10 Songs You Won’t BELIEVE Are About Masturbation [Click for full playlist]

Inside the secret filthy minds of The Beatles, The Eagles, and every classical composer ever! 

Do You Have Time To Masturbate? [Click for full version]
Our messiest flowchart yet.

Do You Have Time To Masturbate? [Click for full version]

Our messiest flowchart yet.

Hey look, it’s both of the national pasttimes in one GIF (from CANADA of all places).

Hey look, it’s both of the national pasttimes in one GIF (from CANADA of all places).

(Source: ohmygodwaytoolong)

Message from Jesus Coalition of America

Don’t let the hand of Satan anywhere near your junk.

(Source: youtube.com)

15 Things You Don’t Want Your New Roommate To Say [Click for full article]

15 Things You Don’t Want Your New Roommate To Say [Click for full article]

Google Suggests “Jacked Off” instead of “Hacked Off”
Ah, right, right. That’s what I meant. What would I do without you, Google?

Google Suggests “Jacked Off” instead of “Hacked Off”

Ah, right, right. That’s what I meant. What would I do without you, Google?

Dinosaurs Using Tissues Inappropriately on Tissue Box
From a Polish tissue box.

Dinosaurs Using Tissues Inappropriately on Tissue Box

From a Polish tissue box.

Images You Should Not Masturbate To
Happy Birthday Grandpa!

Images You Should Not Masturbate To

Happy Birthday Grandpa!

(Source: reddit.com)

Suggesting Masturbation to Fox and Friends
And then I simply smile.

Suggesting Masturbation to Fox and Friends

And then I simply smile.

Jerk Off Contest and Fish Fry

All fish were caught using master bait.

Jerk Off Contest and Fish Fry
All fish were caught using master bait.

(Source: College Humor)


Anti-Masturbatory Gum


In order for it to work, you need to chew on it, spit it out, and stick it in your computer’s motherboard.

In order for it to work, you need to chew on it, spit it out, and stick it in your computer’s motherboard.

(Source: College Humor)