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1. MIX IT UP

Even the greatest roommate sex-overhearing relationships can get tired. So mix it up once in a while: When you lean against your wall to hear your roommates’ grunts and moans better, try leaning in a new position!

2. INCORPORATE FOOD

Chocolate sauce or mango slices can be a great way to reinvigorate your senses while you eavesdrop. Or try alternating sips of ice water and hot water while you listen to your roommates intimately pleasure each other.

3. TAKE IT SLOW

Light some candles, make a playlist, and make a night of it. Tease yourself, slowly getting closer and closer to your roommates’ door until you feel like you’re going to explode. (But make sure you’re still far enough away that if they came out of the room, you wouldn’t seem creepy.)

Finish reading 5 HOT New Ways to Spice Up How You Listen to Your Roommates Have Sex

Oh, baby, that’s the spot. On the other side of that wall.

5 HOT New Ways to Spice Up How You Listen to Your Roommates Have Sex [Click to start reading]

Lonely Breakfast Rap

Not all eggs come over easy.

(Source: youtube.com)

Guy Left Out of Wedding Kiss Picture
He feels the love all around him. And it hurts.

Guy Left Out of Wedding Kiss Picture

He feels the love all around him. And it hurts.

(Source: reddit.com)

Oil Splashes Can Burn and Then You Will Die Lonely
Sometimes the truth hurts. And disfigures.

Oil Splashes Can Burn and Then You Will Die Lonely

Sometimes the truth hurts. And disfigures.

(Source: reddit.com)

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(Source: College Humor)


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An Introduction To St. Shmalentine’s Day

If you’re single, like us, you may find the idea of a holiday centered around love and companionship a bit offensive. We’re here to offer an alternative.

An Introduction To St. Shmalentine’s Day


If you’re single, like us, you may find the idea of a holiday centered around love and companionship a bit offensive. We’re here to offer an alternative.

(Source: College Humor)

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Valentine’s Day Sucks

Resentment is in the air.

 

Valentine’s Day Drink Recipes [click to see more]

 

Valentine’s Day Drink Recipes [click to see more]

(Source: College Humor)

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SkyMall Products for Valentine’s Day [click to see more]

(Source: College Humor)