Stop being a sloppy drunk weirdo and start being a sloppy drunk weirdo…with CLASS!
Finish reading The Difference Between Being Drunk And Being CLASSY
Definitely a good choice.
The Old Fashioned is the quintessential cocktail. Classy, with just the right levels of sweet and bitter notes. And you can make one at home right now!
So you’re at a fancy cocktail bar and you’re trying to read the dimly-lit menu, and you vaguely make out that one drink contains vodka (cool!), ginger (yum!), a splash of something (probably yum!), and two things you’ve never heard of, so you order it on a whim, only to quickly learn that the cocktail is literally a giant, fluorescent strawberry inside another neon strawberry inside a pink glass made out of crushed-together parasols. Whoops!
Don’t panic! Here’s how to SAVE FACE and remain SUPER COOL AND MANLY in front of all your friends (who are all manly construction workers wearing hardhats at all times).
Step 1: Keep Repeating That You Didn’t Know What You Were Ordering Click to keep reading
Dude! Dude, you’re pouring that beer all wrong. Next up "Clinging to what little you know about alcohol like a life raft."
8 Dumb Mistakes You Will Make as a First-Time Drinker [Click for 6 more]
Hi, I’m John, and I’m an alcoholic - who would like to place an order?
Everyday Acting: How to Act at the Bar [Click to BE FOREVER CHANGED]
It’s the greatest stage of them all, and you’ll be on it this weekend.
If Alcohol Had Mascots Like Cereal [Click for the rest]
Only add milk if it’s a White Russian.
If Alcohol Had Mascots Like Cereal [Click for more mascots]
It’s the most important meal of the evening.
If Alcohol Had Mascots Like Cereal [Click for more]
Part of a complete breakfast for drunks.