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People have been inventing stupid shit since the dawn of time. Here are 13 products from the past 50 years that failed to take off for obvious reasons. 

Finish reading 13 WTF Products The World Just Wasn’t Ready For

Yes, it’s essentially no different than a plastic cup, except it is. And what took so long? It’s almost as if inventors of alcohol-related products quit trying after the flask and that hat that lets you drink beer through a straw. If you’re reading this, Anheuser-Busch V.I.P. guy, let’s set up a think tank and brainstorm some new products for all the drunks of tomorrow. They deserve it. 

Yes, it’s essentially no different than a plastic cup, except it is. And what took so long? It’s almost as if inventors of alcohol-related products quit trying after the flask and that hat that lets you drink beer through a straw. If you’re reading this, Anheuser-Busch V.I.P. guy, let’s set up a think tank and brainstorm some new products for all the drunks of tomorrow. They deserve it. 

People have been inventing stupid shit since the dawn of time. Here are 13 products from the past 50 years that failed to take off for obvious reasons. 

Finish reading 13 WTF Products The World Just Wasn’t Ready For

Summer fashions to keep you COOL in more ways than one.

Finish reading 5 Summer Clothing Innovations We’d Actually Use

The Invention of Email

The Year 1971:

Two computer scientists, Ray and Vern, sit at two giant proto-computers set at opposite ends of the room.

Ray: Now sending data packet to remote station two.

Vern: Data received.

Both scientists look up at each other.

Ray: We did it. We sent a file from one networked machine to another.

Vern: We’ve invented electronic mail, Ray! We’re going to revolutionize the way people communicate!

Ray: Our names will be remembered forever.

Vern: You’re right about-oh, hey, I’ve got mail. What’d you send me?

Ray: Just read it.

Vern: Second email ever, right? Let’s see what we got here… it’s asking… it’s asking if I’m satisfied with the size of my penis.

Ray: Well?

Vern: Why did you send this? Why would you send me an email saying my penis is too small?

Ray: So you think it’s too small?

Vern: That’s not funny, Ray! These are the first emails ever; people are going to remember this stuff! Now in the future there’s going to be a museum exhibit about how small my dick is! 

Ray: I… I’m sorry, Vern. I don’t know what came over me.

Vern: Look, let’s just forget about it, okay? We invented email. It’s a great day.

Ray: Damn right it is. By the way, I sent you those photos you asked for.

Vern: Well, thanks. I don’t remember asking for any photos, but oh my god, what the hell is this?

Ray: It’s a virus.

Vern: Why? Why are you doing this?

Ray: Uh, maybe because it’s funny? Don’t be such a n00b, Vern.

Vern: Don’t- what? We’re both newbies! We invented email five minutes ago!

Ray: Sorry, I’m sorry. Listen, let’s put all this behind us. Here, check out these hot XXXsluts I’m sending you.

Vern: I will check out these hot XXX sluts, but it’s only for research.

Ray: Nice, huh?

Vern: Well, yes. Two girls, wow. What are they doing with that cup of oh god oh fuck you, Ray. Fuck. You.

Vern gets up to leave.

Vern: We had a beautiful thing here, Ray. A beautiful thing that you destroyed.

Ray: Destroyed? My poor Vern. This is only the beginning. You think you can escape this by leaving the room? This is going to be everywhere. Everywhere! There’s no escape! LOL!

Vern: Did you-sorry, did you just say “LOL”?

RayLOLLOL!

Vern leaves. Ray continues to shout “LOL" maniacally.

The Year 2015:

A grandfather finishes putting a small child to bed.

Grandfather: …and that’s the story of how e-mail was invented, and how five thousand years of language was reduced to a cheap slurry of half-formed sentences, pornography, and arbitrary aggression. Sleep tight, fucker.

Child: Fuck you too, grandpa.

Grandfather smiles warmly.

Grandfather: Die of AIDS.

Elon Musk

Smells rich.

(Source: youtube.com)

5 Winter Clothing Innovations We'd Actually Use »
Alright guys, so I have this AMAZING idea. You ready? Ok, so I have been thinking, what if we took the restaurant — and put it on wheels? Like our same restaurant, but in a van or better yet, some kind of truck!
The Invention of the Food Truck [Click to finish me off]

Alright guys, so I have this AMAZING idea. You ready? Ok, so I have been thinking, what if we took the restaurant — and put it on wheels? Like our same restaurant, but in a van or better yet, some kind of truck!

The Invention of the Food Truck [Click to finish me off]

6 Simple Ways to Improve Bars »

Superman’s Villians Take Over Shark Tank (with Daymond John)

They maintain a balanced portfolio of high yield investments and kryptonite lasers. Follow Daymond on Twitter @TheSharkDaymond

Please Please Please Let Me Get What I Want: the Infomercial Music Video

Lord knows it would never happen like this in real life.

(Source: youtube.com)

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Inventions Made Better: Alarm Clock

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