“My boyfriend and I decided to cook dinner together one night. We both love spicy food so one ingredient in the meal was “inferno banana peppers” he had grown in his garden that summer. Both of us chopped up some of these peppers for the meal and thought nothing of it. Later that night we started fooling around and he started using his hands on me..you know, down there. Well, if you think residue from inferno peppers burns your mouth, imagine what it does to the sensitive skin of a vag… Thankfully we’re super comfortable with one another and after the immense pain subsided we got a good laugh but anytime we cook with those now, we use gloves!”

“I waitress in a local restaurant that a lot of much older people frequent. One afternoon a man came in and ordered mashed potatoes with his sandwich. When I brought out his food, he took one forkful of the mashed potatoes and complained they weren’t hot enough. I obligingly took the plate back and put his mashed potatoes in the kitchen microwave for thirty seconds. Still, the mashed potatoes didn’t satisfy him. Annoyed, I threw the potatoes back in the microwave for 6 minutes. They were scorched around the edges and bubbling. I knew I probably shouldn’t have brought them over but I did. To my shock/horror, the man dug into the molten mashed potatoes and ate them without wincing. He tipped me double the tab.”