8 Dark Theories About Children’s Movies and TV Shows

Donald Duck suffers from PTSD.

This theory imagines a world in which Donald Duck’s erratic behavior (nightmares, temper tantrums, etc.) is a result of trauma experienced during the Duck’s military service. Now, it is important to note that it is indeed within canon that Donald Duck served as a paratrooper and commando in World War II. It is also important to note that Donald Duck is a fucking cartoon character. Those crazy things he does? The “difficulty falling or staying asleep” and what not? Yeah, that’s supposed to make kids laugh. Are they supposed to sit there and watch him go through a couple REM cycles for a good eight hours? Plus, the logic behind his “persistent avoidance of stimuli associated with [wartime] trauma” is literally “I’ve never heard him discuss these events in any other cartoon.” You’ve also never seen him take a shit. What a load of phooey. Keep Reading

YEAH SCIENCE: The Bizarre World of Animal Sex [Click for full post]

In “Yeah Science” Malibu Einstein covers all the weird, twisted parts of science they won’t talk about on PBS.

Here is what your sex life would look like if you were a clownfish: if you are the biggest one in the group, congrats! You get to be the girl. The second biggest character in the room is now the boy. Everyone else doesn’t develop gonads. Now, you and second-largest-what’shisface retire to some cozy sea anemone to breed and the rest of the school just hangs out, contemplating what it might be like to have real genitals. Now, if something happens to you, as the only breeding female, no sweat! One of those non-breeders will gain weight until they are as big as you, and presto change-o; this anemone is less of a sausage fest than it once was. Every time I see Finding Nemo emblazoned across some young student’s backpack I can’t help but think about what a beautiful and fertile female Nemo might have grown up to be some day with just a few more ounces of weight on his frame. [Keep Reading]

CollegeHumor Comic: Why Mickey Wears Gloves

Donald Duck Tits Salad

Just like mom used to make.

(Source: reddit.com)

10 Pictures of Disney Characters Misbehaving

Disney is a world of good sterile fun. A world where evil is punished and good prevails, where drugs don’t exist, and no one ever poops. So when people in our own imperfect universe get a hold of Disney costumes, sometimes they drag these characters down into dirty, sinful mud of our own world. Here’s 10 people dressed as Disney characters, doing things Disney characters would never do.

(Source: College Humor)

Donald Duck Steps on a Child

Donald did always have a problem with his temper.

(Source: College Humor)