First you’ve got to find it — I’m talking about your car in the parking lot! Then you’ve got to spend a few minutes warming it up — the engine, you pervs!
Stop being a sloppy drunk weirdo and start being a sloppy drunk weirdo…with CLASS!
Finish reading The Difference Between Being Drunk And Being CLASSY
25 Words The Internet Has Rendered Meaningless [Click to finish me off]
Which word(s) do you think have been destroyed most by the Internet?
I say, can you please hand me a biscuit? No, no, the one I vomited on the carpet an hour ago. Mmmthank you.
She must really hate the number 13.
How To F*ck All Romantic [Click for full article]
What up, lovemeisters! Lovemaster D here (formerly Sexxmasta XXxX) to answer all your hot, throbbing questions about the ladies R. E. Colon HOW TO GET THEM.
Now a lot of you always ask me, “Yo, Sexxmasta, I really wanna fuck some classy bitches, but these bitches won’t let me fuck em – what’s these bitches fuckin’ problems?” BZZZT!WRONG! There’s your first problem right there – you think the problem’s with the bitches, when the problem is really with the biggest bitch of all — YOU. And it’s a problem with only one solution: You gotta learn how to FUCK ROMANTIC.
Today, I’m gonna teach you how to fuck all romantic, so can go out and do that and be like “Thanks Sexmasta!” and I’ll be like “You can thank me after you stop fuckin plus there’s two X’s in Sexxmasta but thanks man up top!” Continue
The kibble was a tad dry, don’t you think?