Follow Us

CollegeHumor Staff Blog

GameStop Employee Freaks Out

Sometimes the game of every day life is the most difficult.

(Source: youtube.com)

More Work Sucks

More Work Sucks

Work Sucks: Tornado Warnings Don’t Apply To Assh*les
I’m a security officer and work in a big office building. One night we received a tornado warning so I then evacuated the 85 employees that were still there down to the shelter. I then patrolled all three floors to look for anyone who may have not heard the evacuation announcement. I found one guy in his office who refused to leave stating “Those procedures are for hourly employees and I am busy so please shut my door.” I made two more attempts to get him to the shelter, letting him know that if hes not following procedure that he’s free to go home as I can’t legally hold him in the building however I let him know that should he choose to stay he must follow company procedures regardless of payroll status. He told me to get off my power trip and get out of his face. I went down to the shelter mere seconds before the roof was starting to cave in. When it was all done, I went up to check on him and he fallen to the floor and his desk was laying on top of his cold quivering wet body. He had the balls to then ask me for help.
- Anonymous
Have you dealt with any quivering pussies lately at work? If so then let’s embarrass them together. Send your work sucks stories straight to our Tumblr. 

Work Sucks: Tornado Warnings Don’t Apply To Assh*les

I’m a security officer and work in a big office building. One night we received a tornado warning so I then evacuated the 85 employees that were still there down to the shelter. I then patrolled all three floors to look for anyone who may have not heard the evacuation announcement. I found one guy in his office who refused to leave stating “Those procedures are for hourly employees and I am busy so please shut my door.” I made two more attempts to get him to the shelter, letting him know that if hes not following procedure that he’s free to go home as I can’t legally hold him in the building however I let him know that should he choose to stay he must follow company procedures regardless of payroll status. He told me to get off my power trip and get out of his face. I went down to the shelter mere seconds before the roof was starting to cave in. When it was all done, I went up to check on him and he fallen to the floor and his desk was laying on top of his cold quivering wet body. He had the balls to then ask me for help.

- Anonymous

Have you dealt with any quivering pussies lately at work? If so then let’s embarrass them together. Send your work sucks stories straight to our Tumblr. 

Work Sucks: I’m Allergic To Oxygen
Welcome to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. If your job sucks even worse than this, submit your story at the bottom of this page.
I work at a nursing home. This one old lady got a new roomate who need oxygen on all the time. She asked one day what the noise was, referring to the oxygen machine, I told her what it was and she responded with “oh, that’s why I haven’t been feeling well lately, I am allergic to oxygen.” I didn’t even know how to respond to this.- Anonymous
I work in a restaurant and saw my boss use the grill scraper to clean shit off the floor. He then used it on the grill without cleaning it…in front of customers.- Anonymous
Today’s Tumblr Submission comes from: monimonster123
Customer walks up to customer service desk.Me asking politely: “How can I help you, sir?”C: “What do you think I want, a hamburger?!”I work in a hardware store. My job is to answer customer questions, connect customers with employees from each department, supervise the cashiers, ring people up, answer phones, and do exchanges and returns.Kinda shocked, but still polite, Me: “Umm…so a return?’Glaring at me, C: “Yea”.I quietly return his item.Bluntly, C: “Call your manager.”I call. My manager arrives, and he and the customer go outside the store and stand in front of my window. The customer complains about my service, all because I asked how I could help him.Customer leaves and my manager walks back in.Manager: “Can you believe that guy? He told me exactly what he said to you. Some people…”I handle many complaints at the store, and most people that complain are just grumpy assholes, but few are stupid enough to tell the truth.
Submit your crappy work stories straight to Tumblr. 

Work Sucks: I’m Allergic To Oxygen

Welcome to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. If your job sucks even worse than this, submit your story at the bottom of this page.

I work at a nursing home. This one old lady got a new roomate who need oxygen on all the time. She asked one day what the noise was, referring to the oxygen machine, I told her what it was and she responded with “oh, that’s why I haven’t been feeling well lately, I am allergic to oxygen.” I didn’t even know how to respond to this.
- Anonymous

I work in a restaurant and saw my boss use the grill scraper to clean shit off the floor. He then used it on the grill without cleaning it…in front of customers.
- Anonymous

Today’s Tumblr Submission comes from: monimonster123

Customer walks up to customer service desk.
Me asking politely: “How can I help you, sir?”
C: “What do you think I want, a hamburger?!”
I work in a hardware store. My job is to answer customer questions, connect customers with employees from each department, supervise the cashiers, ring people up, answer phones, and do exchanges and returns.
Kinda shocked, but still polite, Me: “Umm…so a return?’
Glaring at me, C: “Yea”.
I quietly return his item.
Bluntly, C: “Call your manager.”
I call. My manager arrives, and he and the customer go outside the store and stand in front of my window. The customer complains about my service, all because I asked how I could help him.
Customer leaves and my manager walks back in.
Manager: “Can you believe that guy? He told me exactly what he said to you. Some people…”
I handle many complaints at the store, and most people that complain are just grumpy assholes, but few are stupid enough to tell the truth.

Submit your crappy work stories straight to Tumblr. 

Work Sucks: My Little Princess

In my first year of college I worked at Abercrombie and Fitch (kids) store. It was a pretty boring job. Folding clothes, setting up new sets of clothes, saying the crappy tag line, checking out and changing rooms. One day I had to work the changing rooms. I see three girls who are like 12 years old and a botox mom with them all carrying lots of victoria secret bags. (Why 12 year olds need to buy lots of stuff from victoria secret I do not know…) So this girl grabs probably 15 items and I told her she couldn’t take all the items in the changing rooms. She starts getting hissy and calls her mom over saying how I wouldn’t let her in the changing room. I had to explain to her mom why 15 items weren’t allowed because you can only take 5 items of clothing into a changing room. Her mom tells her to give me the clothes she doesn’t want to take into the changing room. Well the girl starts throwing the clothes at me! When she finished throwing the clothes at me. I asked her, “Is there anything else I can help you with little princess!” Her mom asked for the manager and complained about me. My manager took me to the back room. Right when we entered he busted out laughing. He said that was some funny shit you said but don’t ever do that again. My manager told me to just stay in the back room till they left and do nothing.
- Justin B

If your job sucks, like most do, then submit those complaints to us right here on Tumblr. Sharing misery is what the Internet was made for.

Work Sucks: How Much Milk Did Cleopatra Use For Baths?
Welcome to Work Sucks, where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. If you think your job sucks then submit to us right here on Tumblr. We feel your pain.
i work as a cashier in a supermarket and we get the occasional nutcase, last Thursday evening i sold 35 bottles of milk (6 pints each) to this odd gentleman. That’s a total of about 210 litres. i asked him what it was for and he told me that he wished to bathe in it. After staring at him blankly, he continued with, ‘you know, like Cleopatra?’- Anonymous
I absolutely fucking HATE hearing the following phrase when a customer’s item either won’t ring up or doesn’t have a bar code: “If it doesn’t ring up, it’s free right?” Every fucking time.- Anonymous
I am unemployed, so that kinda sucks.- Sam Z

Work Sucks: How Much Milk Did Cleopatra Use For Baths?

Welcome to Work Sucks, where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. If you think your job sucks then submit to us right here on Tumblr. We feel your pain.

i work as a cashier in a supermarket and we get the occasional nutcase, last Thursday evening i sold 35 bottles of milk (6 pints each) to this odd gentleman. That’s a total of about 210 litres. i asked him what it was for and he told me that he wished to bathe in it. After staring at him blankly, he continued with, ‘you know, like Cleopatra?’
- Anonymous

I absolutely fucking HATE hearing the following phrase when a customer’s item either won’t ring up or doesn’t have a bar code: “If it doesn’t ring up, it’s free right?” Every fucking time.
- Anonymous

I am unemployed, so that kinda sucks.
- Sam Z

Work Sucks: Slapped By A Sweet Old Lady [Click for full post]
On weekends I volunteer at an old folk’s home. On my second day working there, I was greeted at the entrance by the friendly dog that belongs to the home. I walked in with in with him and noticed a sweet old woman in a wheelchair beckoning me over. I smiled and asked what I could do for her. She slapped me and said, “I told you not to bring dogs in the house, bitch.” Lesson Learned: Never judge a book by its cover. Because even a sweet looking old lady in a pastel pink sweater can slap you and call you a bitch.
- Becka S
I worked at a Baskin Robbins for a year, dealing with the shittiest owner ever. He constantly made me work 8+ hour shifts by myself without a break and broke several other labor laws. I never confronted him because money is money and I needed the job. Today I was fired because last Sunday, a day i had requested off, i was scheduled to open, but didn’t since it should have been covered. Well guess who just call got off the phone with BR headquaters, the health department, and the family lawyer regarding serveral health and labor law violations? Yeah, better lawyer up bitch.- Anonymous
Does work suck for you too? Submit your stories straight to our Tumblr and let the world know.

Work Sucks: Slapped By A Sweet Old Lady [Click for full post]

On weekends I volunteer at an old folk’s home. On my second day working there, I was greeted at the entrance by the friendly dog that belongs to the home. I walked in with in with him and noticed a sweet old woman in a wheelchair beckoning me over. I smiled and asked what I could do for her. She slapped me and said, “I told you not to bring dogs in the house, bitch.” Lesson Learned: Never judge a book by its cover. Because even a sweet looking old lady in a pastel pink sweater can slap you and call you a bitch.

- Becka S

I worked at a Baskin Robbins for a year, dealing with the shittiest owner ever. He constantly made me work 8+ hour shifts by myself without a break and broke several other labor laws. I never confronted him because money is money and I needed the job. Today I was fired because last Sunday, a day i had requested off, i was scheduled to open, but didn’t since it should have been covered. Well guess who just call got off the phone with BR headquaters, the health department, and the family lawyer regarding serveral health and labor law violations? Yeah, better lawyer up bitch.
- Anonymous

Does work suck for you too? Submit your stories straight to our Tumblr and let the world know.

Work Sucks: Butts Make the Best Headrests
If work is ruining your life too then tell the world! Submit your story to our inbox and you could be published in the next issue. 
I was in the office relaxing in a chair. I leaned my head back and thought to myself, “Wow, what a comfy headrest.” Then I realized, that chair didn’t have a headrest. I had been leaning head against my cute co-worker’s ass for 2 minutes and she never said a thing.- Anonymous
Today, I had to call the Australian Passport office to track my passport. Turns out they lost it in the mail. A week ago, I got my dream job as a flight attendant. Without a passport they won’t accept me. I lost my dream job before I even started it.- Anonymous
I just got fired for not working on my vacation.- D.S. 
In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. 

Work Sucks: Butts Make the Best Headrests

If work is ruining your life too then tell the world! Submit your story to our inbox and you could be published in the next issue. 

I was in the office relaxing in a chair. I leaned my head back and thought to myself, “Wow, what a comfy headrest.” Then I realized, that chair didn’t have a headrest. I had been leaning head against my cute co-worker’s ass for 2 minutes and she never said a thing.
- Anonymous

Today, I had to call the Australian Passport office to track my passport. Turns out they lost it in the mail. A week ago, I got my dream job as a flight attendant. Without a passport they won’t accept me. I lost my dream job before I even started it.
- Anonymous

I just got fired for not working on my vacation.
- D.S. 

In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. 

How to Get Hired By Seeming Like a Serial Killer [Click for more]
Welcome to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. If your job sucks too then submit your story to us on Tumblr and it might be featured in the next column.
I work for Comcast as an installer, one of my duties is disconnecting cable. I disconnected a guy on Superbowl Sunday right before the game, I could see his living room with a flat screen set up and cars lining the street for a party. A minute before kick off, I pulled the wire, before I could get down the pole, the guy comes out with a gun shooting at me. I got the hell out of there and called the cops. - Anonymous
So some kid kept on asking her mom to get her candy while I was at work today. When they came by to check out, the mom asked me, “You are so skinny. What do you eat usually?” I answered, “Spinach. Lots of spinach.” The look on her kid’s face was priceless. - Anonymous
I work at a restaurant where we pass out pagers when your food is ready. A mother and young boy ordered their food and the boy kept reaching up. The mother handed him the pager and said “He always enjoys playing with my vibrator.” My eyes got wide as I tried not to laugh. Then she said “uh I mean buzzer thingy” and made a bee line for the drink station. - Anonymous - Continue reading

How to Get Hired By Seeming Like a Serial Killer [Click for more]

Welcome to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you more of the best of your worst work stories from the past year. If your job sucks too then submit your story to us on Tumblr and it might be featured in the next column.

I work for Comcast as an installer, one of my duties is disconnecting cable. I disconnected a guy on Superbowl Sunday right before the game, I could see his living room with a flat screen set up and cars lining the street for a party. A minute before kick off, I pulled the wire, before I could get down the pole, the guy comes out with a gun shooting at me. I got the hell out of there and called the cops. - Anonymous

So some kid kept on asking her mom to get her candy while I was at work today. When they came by to check out, the mom asked me, “You are so skinny. What do you eat usually?” I answered, “Spinach. Lots of spinach.” The look on her kid’s face was priceless. - Anonymous

I work at a restaurant where we pass out pagers when your food is ready. A mother and young boy ordered their food and the boy kept reaching up. The mother handed him the pager and said “He always enjoys playing with my vibrator.” My eyes got wide as I tried not to laugh. Then she said “uh I mean buzzer thingy” and made a bee line for the drink station. - Anonymous - Continue reading

Work Sucks: The Best of the Worst [Click full  read]
Welcome back to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you the very best of your worst work stories from the past year. 

My raise over the past two years has been a total of 11 cents. - Anonymous
I have been an AP physics teacher for around six years. I thought I was a pretty good one at that. Almost none of my students failed, and I thought I was pretty nice. Until I found a facebook group specially made to hate me. Almost every student I have taught has joined the group. And to add more, the principal , and some other staff have joined it. - Anonymous
I sell crocs. - Anonymous

If your job sucks even worse than this, submit your story here.

Work Sucks: The Best of the Worst [Click full  read]

Welcome back to Work Sucks, the column where you get to complain about your most terrible, lousy, soul-sucking jobs. In this issue, we’ve brought you the very best of your worst work stories from the past year. 

My raise over the past two years has been a total of 11 cents. - Anonymous

I have been an AP physics teacher for around six years. I thought I was a pretty good one at that. Almost none of my students failed, and I thought I was pretty nice. Until I found a facebook group specially made to hate me. Almost every student I have taught has joined the group. And to add more, the principal , and some other staff have joined it. - Anonymous

I sell crocs. - Anonymous

If your job sucks even worse than this, submit your story here.

I’ve just spent 25 minutes locked in a basement, having to call a friend to look up my boss in the phonebook to get him come get me out, have got yelled at by a 80 year old dude foaming at the mouth, with said foam flying out at my face, had a 60 year old woman show me her bare, 1 hour fresh scarred chest to explain that she can’t shower because she just had surgery done (I work in a hotel opposite a hospital), and got electrocuted. It’s my first day.

Work Sucks - I got electrocuted

How bad could your day have really been?

I make grocery store ads. Every now and then we do special deals and I send out an email to the clients asking if they want to participate. Every time I do this almost half the clients print my email, circle their answer (“yes” or “no”), and fax it back to me. The other half email back “ok”.

Work Sucks - Fax back

I work in a drugstore. One day this guy in his twenties comes in, picks up some normal male condoms, and comes to the counter. He said, “Don’t worry, these are for my girlfriend.”

I edit porn for a living. Checkmate.

I work in a sneaker store. This huge fat guy comes in with huge feet at least size 12. He then points out different sneakers and asks for them all in size 7, and proceeds to try them all on. Try explaining 50 brand new shoes with squashed heels and torn laces to your boss.

Work Sucks - You’re not a size 7.