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Honest Music Festival Map [Click for encore]

Expertly navigating a music festival can be a difficult task if you’re not well-equipped. Luckily for you, we’ve pieced together a handy little guide of everything you’ll encounter.

Mouseover map to reveal the reality of music festivals

Honest Music Festival Commercial [Click to watch]
Just wait till that guy finds the drugs!

Honest Music Festival Commercial [Click to watch]

Just wait till that guy finds the drugs!

Guy Almost Gets Away With Stealing Guitar
His guitar hiding is like his guitar playing: a tight jam.

Guy Almost Gets Away With Stealing Guitar

His guitar hiding is like his guitar playing: a tight jam.

(Source: reddit.com)

Screencap - Gotcha.

Screencap - Gotcha.

Regret Everything - Your Facebook, No One Cares [Click to continue reading]
While we will never be able to fully stop internet piracy, there is one fact that should reassure those who are scared of internet theft: most people do not give a crap about you.
This past week there was a surge of people who posted a swatch of legalese to their Facebook walls declaring their copyright to their Facebook walls. Unneeded for two reasons: 1) your copyright is implied automatically and 2) nobody wants your photos of your brunch. Honestly, it’s all yours.
People who are extra paranoid about their personal data being mined remind me of people who not only believe in past lives, but that they were SOMEONE COOL in a past life. “I was a priest in a past life, someone who guarded secrets,” my neighbor Nan would whisper when I collected for my paper route (I assume my collections were some of her few opportunities for conversation). “I still have that power.” Nan wore paper shoes, had a living room that smelled like glue and I presume never entertained the notion that in the past life she was someone who sat around wondering who she was in past lives. [Keep Reading]

Regret Everything - Your Facebook, No One Cares [Click to continue reading]

While we will never be able to fully stop internet piracy, there is one fact that should reassure those who are scared of internet theft: most people do not give a crap about you.

This past week there was a surge of people who posted a swatch of legalese to their Facebook walls declaring their copyright to their Facebook walls. Unneeded for two reasons: 1) your copyright is implied automatically and 2) nobody wants your photos of your brunch. Honestly, it’s all yours.

People who are extra paranoid about their personal data being mined remind me of people who not only believe in past lives, but that they were SOMEONE COOL in a past life. “I was a priest in a past life, someone who guarded secrets,” my neighbor Nan would whisper when I collected for my paper route (I assume my collections were some of her few opportunities for conversation). “I still have that power.” Nan wore paper shoes, had a living room that smelled like glue and I presume never entertained the notion that in the past life she was someone who sat around wondering who she was in past lives. [Keep Reading]

His motto: Private screenings for cleaning privates.

His motto: Private screenings for cleaning privates.

Impenetrable Security
The fortress is secure.

Impenetrable Security

The fortress is secure.

(Source: reddit.com)

Secret Agent Telemarketer Prank

I told this telemarketer that he was really a secret agent with a modified memory!

(Source: youtube.com)

Last Meal
See more Amazing Super Powers here

Last Meal

See more Amazing Super Powers here

Great New iPhone 5 Security Feature

It’s as easy as getting a new phone every time you forget your password.

(Source: youtube.com)

The Olympic Banana

"Hey, that’s not a McNana." - An Olympic security guard, right after spitting out his McCafe.

(Source: youtube.com)

If Comic Conventions Had Warning Signs [Click to continue reading]

If Comic Conventions Had Warning Signs [Click to continue reading]

(Source: College Humor)

Smart Electronics Thief Evades Security Cameras

It’s only getting caught if you get caught

(Source: College Humor)


Door Chain Lock Puzzle


The real puzzle begins when you have to explain yourself to the maid

The real puzzle begins when you have to explain yourself to the maid

(Source: College Humor)

Work Sucks, I Know: Issue #62

I work as a loss prevention investigator at a retail store (stop shop lifter’s). One day my boss and I attempted to stop a woman for stealing $140 worth of merchandise ranging from clothes to candles (all of which she fit in her purse somehow). Anyways, as we tried to stop her but she refused to stop. She just kept walking and walked into the grocery store next door. I went to inform the other stores LP of the situation and my boss continued to follow the woman to the bathroom, where the woman locked herself.

Meanwhile the police were contacted and I waited outside to explain the situation to the officers. Once the officers arrived we walked back to the bathroooms to meet up with my boss. Turns out the woman had shit her pants while attempting to flee us. The woman panicked when she realized that there were two cops waiting outside the bathroom and tried to flush the merchandise she had stolen. The worst part was she didn’t flush the mess first. All of the merchandise was pulled out of the toilet and put into a plastic garbage can which i got to take back to our store and sort through the shit and toilet paper covered merchandise. It wasn’t all bad though, after the cops finished questioning her they paraded her down the sidewalk next to a crowded parking lot in handcuffs with a shit stain on her pants back to my office so I could do my report and questioning.

Read more of this week’s best stories

(Source: College Humor)