Screencap - Jesus, Mary and Joseph
20 Questions You Should Never Ask in Class [Click for full article]
- I know you said that this wouldn’t be included on the exam, but [INSERT ANYTHINGHERE].
- Yes, but would these principles still hold true if humans existed in a vacuum in outer space and there was no such thing as linear time or reality?
- Before I jump into the recurring motifs in Emily Dickinson’s poetry, can someone tell me if the tribal tattoo on my lower back looks infected?
- Is our textbook missing a chapter? I couldn’t find the part where it explains that the Holocaust was all just a hilarious hoax.
- Aren’t we just cheating ourselves in the long run if we all don’t read The Brothers Karamazov in its native Russian?
- Could I make my final project about how all of this “Introduction to Physics” stuff is kind of like Twitter?
- This is a little off topic, but could we safely say that we have now officially entered the post-post-post-modern age?
- Would you mind elaborating a bit more on the critical response to the homosexual undercurrents of Hitchcock’s earlier films? Also, what the fuck is a homosexual?
- How come we’re not reading any J.K. Rowling? Isn’t this Classics of American Literature? [Keep Reading]
It’s a dog-eat-dog world (because they picked that over dog-eat-poop).
Step 1: Ask on Yahoo
Time to discover what kind of future you’re already setting yourself up for.
Santa’s Yahoo Answers [Click to keep reading]
Well who’s he supposed to ask? The elves?
Once a week, resident chill-Internet-girl Marina will have a glass of whiskey and then answer your questions about life, love, college, sex or anything else you’ve got on your mind. There will be GIFS.
Do internet relationships work? – P.T, Des Moines
Internet relationships sound great in theory. You can spend 15 minutes perfectly crafting a casual-but-hilarious response to every message and defy the laws of physics with your biceps. Of course, the problem with all of this is that you’re essentially just dating a photoshopped version of someone. And everything thing that makes the relationship easy—like ability to have long, meaningful conversations with them while taking a shit—can warp you into the kid who treats his love life like a sexy game of Farmville (water relationship, wait three hours, receive boob pix). Want a pen pal? Go wild. Want a relationship? Keep it offline. Boobs look better IRL anyway.
If you’re approaching a two-set at the club and trying to F-close how long do you cold read before negging to demonstrate value? – Ryan
Oh. Oh, buddy. No.
How Long Would You Survive The Zombie Apocalypse [Click to start]
The Zombie Apocalypse is almost upon us! You may think you’re a shoe in to stay alive, but your survival really comes down to how you handle complex ethical questions, moral dilemmas, and practical problems. Luckily this quiz has been designed to sort through your answers, and determine how long you will survive without actually letting a zombie gnaw your brains. So start answering and see how long you’ll make it in the age of the undead!
How many dangerous lies and vicious rumors are there if Daddy Fat Stacks blocks his shine at the same rate as the bombs over Baghdad?
We sent our reporter to the Philadelphia Eagles’ home opener and asked their fans a lot of questions. The only problem? Our cards had all the wrong answers.