New Year’s is all about wearing a party hat…if you know what I mean.
Here’s why Bill Murray is worth celebrating year-round, from crashing parties to showing up at our kickball game (for real!).
Nothing like NYE for bringing out the many faces of vodka. And vodka drinkers.
More moves than a bowl full of jelly.
It’s the most dank time of the year.
ICYMI: Party at Your House
A late contender for terrible music video of the year
TLDNR: What if the Apocalypse Really Does Come on 12/21/12 [Click for full article]
The Mayans long ago created a calendar that is set to expire on 12/21/12. Many across the world have interpreted this as a doomsday prophecy and are flocking to areas of supposed significance, awaiting the end of times. The chance that a pre-Columbian society with an admittedly advanced understanding of heavenly motion – though not nearly as advanced as ours now – could predict the expiration date of earth more than five hundred years in the future is, to put it kindly, remote. However, as with all analysis of likelihoods, there is of course a chance that the Mayans could be correct. And that would just suck, right?!
All this time we could have been having orgies, experimenting with lethal drugs and stealing military planes to go for joy rides, but, whoops, didn’t believe the Mayans! Instead of writing this stupid article I could be out eating a hundred lobsters, literally stuffing myself with lobster until my stomach walls ripped open, because, hey, why not? Or I could be stuffing you with lobsters. We could do it to each other with lobsters. At an orgy. On that military plane that flies in a parabolic arc so that the passengers achieve weightlessness. We could be doing that, but we didn’t believe the Mayans. [Keep Reading]
We found the worst teenage girl music video of 2012, and it only took until mid-December.
What You Say During A Holiday Party, And What You Really Mean [Click for full article]
“I work at a Chuck E Cheese. I watched a little girl steal about 50 tokens out of a box we keep (not very well) hidden. Then she told me that a machine ate 7 tokens. I told her to stop putting tokens into a machine if 1 doesn’t make it work. Then she started crying?”
What You Say During a Holiday Party, and What You Really Mean [Click for full article]
“I finally got a raise after almost 3 years of working my tail off. After a weekend of celebrating I came back Monday to find out I had been fired for not clocking out.”
Old People Go Hard [Click for full gallery]
Age is just a number of very disturbing images.
“Gain Weight: You’ve been at college for the better part of three months, and in this time you’ve gone to a few classes, made a few friends, drank a few beers, and made far too many trips to the dessert bar. Instead of owning up to the fact that you now barely fit into your t-shirts and exclusively wear sweat pants, you continue on with your Easy Mac eating ways, oblivious to your growing gut. On the bright side, you are not alone. You’ll be surprised to find that many of your friends, both male and female, have put on a few extra pounds. Instead of wallowing in your grease-laden tears, throw caution to the wind and drink 13 Natty Ice’s with your high school friends and then go home to drunkenly eat all of the Thanksgiving leftovers.”