I’ll try to write a joke here once I’m done crying.
Knock, knock. Hey, sport. Are you busy? Well, just take a quick homework break. We need to talk.
Yes, “the talk.”
I know, I know, this is a bit awkward. But you’re growing up and as your father I need to tell you about, uh, how the world works. I just want to make sure you have all the facts. About jay-walking.
Click to see more: Son, We Need To Talk About Jaywalking
Shoot for the moon, kid, becase even if you miss, you’ll still land that job at Burger King.
You should really see this kid’s good riting.
He doesn’t know when you are sleeping or when you’re awake because HE’S NOT REAL!
"When did we win the lottery?"
When you were seven you had never seen more than forty-five dollars in one place, so the thought that you’d spend that much money on a gift for one person is earth shattering. Do you know how much lemonade you’d have to sell in December to acquire that amount of wealth? Yes, you’re an adult who can do math. When you were seven you could get away with giving mom something you made in art class, but now you have some means of income so a “push pot” just isn’t going to cut it.
(Source: College Humor)
"I will return to you, my love."
Seasons may change. But teenage boys do not.