Who’s worse: Dr. Hannibal Lector or Zoidberg?
Should You Trust That Doctor? Matrix [Click for full chart]
Finish reading —> 6 Bar Games You Can Play with Just Your Smartphone
Why complain about people checking their phones when you could make a whole game out of it? Next time you’re at the bar, try these simple smartphone-based games to liven up even the most boring of bars.
Greatest. Freakout. Ever.
In honor of Sir Richard Attenborough, here’s his one (and only) appearance in a Dorkly comic.
You’ve played all these games. You just didn’t know it.
Finish reading —> If Videogames Were Based on Your Actual Life
Finish reading —> If College Were More Like Videogames
He’s got a license to kill within the agreed-upon multiplayer rules.
Illustrated by Caldwell Tanner
Written by Caldwell & Dorkly Editor-In-Chief Andrew Bridgman.
- At the load screen, tap the K Star six times in a row to skip right to being spotted by a Big Hollywood Agent who wants to make you a Big Hollywood Super Star.
- At the character select screen, swipe down, then left, then left again to gain 5000 Social Media points and a write-up on a some blog calling you an “Instagram Celeb.”
- Tap the Hollywood sign twelve times to up your Star Rating by fucking a photographer at the Torque premiere.
- When talking to the VALET PARKING GUY outside Kim’s perfume launch party, TIP TRIPLE to get four free Speedballs and an exclusive invite to McG’s forty-fifth at his Venice fuckpad.
- When Jake (the Journalist) asks you out, instead of tapping “Sure!” or “Let’s just be friends”, scroll left, then right, then left, then right, then up, then down to gain 100 Love Points and instead get martinis with Chez, a guy who “did some consulting on SAW VI” and “can definitely get you your own reality show, hundo percent.”
BONUS: To up your Star Rating, sign whatever he hands you. That way you can skip all the hard shit.
- When out shopping with Kim, shoplift. It saves Money and increases your Style Points. Plus, whatever, it’ll be fine.
Finish reading Cheat Codes for the Kim Kardashian iPhone Game