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THIS SUMMER’S GONNA BE ALL ABOUT SURF, SAND, AND SHAKY PLOT STRUCTURE.

Finish reading More Accurate Titles for This Summer’s Movies

10 Things That Still Bother Me About 10 Things I Hate About You

1. There’s One Shakespeare Quote in the First 10 Minutes and Then Never Again

We all know that the movie is based on The Taming of the Shrew, but in case we didn’t, Cameron helpfully reminds us by seeing Bianca and going, “I burn, I pine, I perish,” which is a totally normal thing to say in a 90s high school environment. It’s also a direct quote from the original play, which kinda makes you think there are going to be a couple more quotes scattered throughout. Nope! Just that one random line! And then never again! Okay!

(P.S. Yes, Michael does say more stuff like “assail your ears” and “sweet love, renew thy force” but those are from Hamlet and Sonnet 56 so NICE TRY.)

2. The Whole Black Underwear Thing

Kat is branded a sex freak by sneaky snoops Bianca and Cameron when they find black underwear in her room, because apparently that means “she wants to have sex someday.” Sorry, what? Is Bianca saying she herself DOESN’T want to have sex someday? Like, EVER? Also, Kat is a senior in high school, which is a pretty normal age to think about the POSSIBILITY of SOMEDAY having sex. Also, maybe she just likes how she looks in black underwear. This whole scene was weird.

Finish reading 10 Things That Still Bother Me About 10 Things I Hate About You

8 Minor Movie Characters I Still Feel Really Bad For [Click for full post]
1. The Guy Who Gets Shot in The Hallway In “Terminator 2”
Terminator 2 was the first R-Rated movie I saw in the theaters, and as a child, I wasn’t tooscarred by the specific, graphic violence throughout the movie (certainly not to a Temple of Doom nightmare-inducing degree), but I always felt really really bad for this random sad dude walking around the back-hallways of the shopping mall who gets unceremoniously shot to death by the T-1000.Think about it: The guy is ALREADY a professional “behind-the-scenes mall worker,” which is friggin’ sad enough — the ONLY PERK of that boring dead-end life is that you don’t get remorselessly shot seven times for happening to be in the same hallway as two killer robots settling a future-war.
Honorable Mention: The chubby hospital security guard who gets stabbed through the eye. Equally sad, but also pretty bad-ass, and at least the T-1000 meant to kill him. To this day I still look over my shoulder every time I use a Keurig.
Finish reading 8 Minor Movie Characters I Still Feel Really Bad For

8 Minor Movie Characters I Still Feel Really Bad For [Click for full post]

1. The Guy Who Gets Shot in The Hallway In “Terminator 2”

Terminator 2 was the first R-Rated movie I saw in the theaters, and as a child, I wasn’t tooscarred by the specific, graphic violence throughout the movie (certainly not to a Temple of Doom nightmare-inducing degree), but I always felt really really bad for this random sad dude walking around the back-hallways of the shopping mall who gets unceremoniously shot to death by the T-1000.

Think about it: The guy is ALREADY a professional “behind-the-scenes mall worker,” which is friggin’ sad enough — the ONLY PERK of that boring dead-end life is that you 
don’t get remorselessly shot seven times for happening to be in the same hallway as two killer robots settling a future-war.

Honorable Mention: The chubby hospital security guard who gets stabbed through the eye. Equally sad, but also pretty bad-ass, and at least the T-1000 meant to kill him. To this day I still look over my shoulder every time I use a Keurig.

Finish reading 8 Minor Movie Characters I Still Feel Really Bad For

CAN’T UNSEE: Joaquin Phoenix’ Forehead is the True Star of “Her”

Just tilt your head to the right, and watch Joaquin’s forehead’s Oscar-worthy performance.

(Source: youtube.com)

Even wizards need day jobs.

Even wizards need day jobs.

Back to the Future With Skrillex

Where we’re going, we don’t need melodies.

The War of 1812: The Movie

Just as well-written as your 8th grade history notes.

Spoilers: they’re just as annoying as they are online.

Finish reading Internet Commenters in Day-to-day Life

Watching All 3 Transformers Movies at the Same Time (Oh, the Similarities)

3 times the character development!

(Source: youtube.com)

Kung Fu Edited With Lil Wayne Vocal Stabs

Weezy FX Baby

(Source: youtube.com)

This movie is fantastic and you should see it.
We have some free passes to screenings of Obvious Child. Come get them. 1st come 1st served!

This movie is fantastic and you should see it.

We have some free passes to screenings of Obvious Child. Come get them. 1st come 1st served!

Honest Trailers - Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen

Apparently this thing transformed into a major motion picture?

(Source: youtube.com)

Finish reading How Long Would Each Disney Princess Last On ‘Game of Thrones’?

The Internet loves imagining Disney Princesses in other fantasy universes — Star Wars, the Marvel Universe, Doctor Who, and, yes, Game of Thrones. But what if the beloved animated Princesses actually were on Game of Thrones? The real question isn’t who they would be or what they would do in Westeros, it’s "how long they would survive before getting axed by the trigger-happy George R.R. Martin?"

In honor of the Season 4 Finale, we’ve taken a good, hard look at the pantheon of Disney Princesses, and estimated how long they could stick it on the show before getting Ned Stark’d:

WARNING: You are now entering the GUYZONE, where BROS go to chat about GUY STUFF that only DUDES XPERIENCE. U Ladies just STR8 UP WON’T UNDERSTAND! Which is why from this point on it’s strictly NO CHICKS ALLOWED!!!!!
So without further adude, here are the 7 Things that Only GUYS WILL GET.

WARNING: You are now entering the GUYZONE, where BROS go to chat about GUY STUFF that only DUDES XPERIENCE. U Ladies just STR8 UP WON’T UNDERSTAND! Which is why from this point on it’s strictly NO CHICKS ALLOWED!!!!!

So without further adude, here are the 7 Things that Only GUYS WILL GET.

Lion King: The Honest Movie Trailer

Oh, I just can’t wait to be all jaded about this childhood classic.

(Source: youtube.com)