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Interior: Giant Shower With Unfrosted Glass On All Four Sides Somehow.ANASTASIA STEELE, a busty half-Asian Student / Journalist / Cop-Scientist is showering for five and a half minutes while the Opening Credits Roll. Royalty-free cool-Jazz background music is playing, indicating that something SEXY is happening in 1997 or you’re in the bathroom at a W Hotel.
ANASTASIA towels herself off and exits the bathroom. Her roommate KATE, a petite but busty blond 36-year-old college student is laying on her bed in a tight yellow cocktail dress, masturbating. KATE is startled.
 ANASTASIA

Hey there Kate. I see you’re having fun.

 KATE

What can I say, Ana, ever since I started dating Mike, I’m just too hot and bothered all the time, I just want everyone. And I mean… everyone.

KATE lovingly caresses ANA’s towel.
 ANASTASIA (Lovingly)

Lucky you. Ever since Dave and I broke up, I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever get touched again. Except by you, haha.

KATE

Fuck Dave. He was a shit.

ANA playfully pushes KATE’S hand away and they both laugh, then lock eyes. They caress their faces together. The mood turns erotic.
ANASTASIA

Before we do this, I have to tell you — I’ve only been with another woman one other time today.

 Finish reading If “50 Shades Of Grey” Were A Cinemax Movie

Interior: Giant Shower With Unfrosted Glass On All Four Sides Somehow.ANASTASIA STEELE, a busty half-Asian Student / Journalist / Cop-Scientist is showering for five and a half minutes while the Opening Credits Roll. Royalty-free cool-Jazz background music is playing, indicating that something SEXY is happening in 1997 or you’re in the bathroom at a W Hotel.

ANASTASIA towels herself off and exits the bathroom. Her roommate KATE, a petite but busty blond 36-year-old college student is laying on her bed in a tight yellow cocktail dress, masturbating. KATE is startled.

 ANASTASIA

Hey there Kate. I see you’re having fun.

 KATE

What can I say, Ana, ever since I started dating Mike, I’m just too hot and bothered all the time, I just want everyone. And I mean… everyone.

KATE lovingly caresses ANA’s towel.

 ANASTASIA (Lovingly)

Lucky you. Ever since Dave and I broke up, I’m starting to wonder if I’ll ever get touched again. Except by you, haha.

KATE

Fuck Dave. He was a shit.

ANA playfully pushes KATE’S hand away and they both laugh, then lock eyes. They caress their faces together. The mood turns erotic.

ANASTASIA

Before we do this, I have to tell you — I’ve only been with another woman one other time today.

 Finish reading If “50 Shades Of Grey” Were A Cinemax Movie

A real click-turner.

Finish readingIf Popular Books Had Clickbait Titles

50 Shades of Chicken
Put some spice in your kitchen.

50 Shades of Chicken

Put some spice in your kitchen.

(Source: reddit.com)

New Names for 12 Common Items [Continue Reading]

New Names for 12 Common Items [Continue Reading]

CollegeHumor’s Halloween Costume Contest [Click to start voting & submitting]

The sooner you submit the better! First place gets $500, second place prize is $200 and third place is $100. Submit your costume by 11:59pm on November 3rd to be included in the contest.

Man Far Too Excited Reading 50 Shades of Grey on Bus
Obviously he just has a thing for great narrative.

Man Far Too Excited Reading 50 Shades of Grey on Bus

Obviously he just has a thing for great narrative.

(Source: weknowmemes.com)

Fifty Shades of Aw-Hell-Naw
Christian Grey is nasty.

Fifty Shades of Aw-Hell-Naw

Christian Grey is nasty.

(Source: humortrain.com)

50 Shades of Grey Cast Announced
First announcement the cast for the major motion picture ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’.

50 Shades of Grey Cast Announced

First announcement the cast for the major motion picture ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’.

(Source: hollywoodleek.com)

Fifty Shades of Grey Listed Under Classics
Well, on the positive side, at least people will consider it a chore to read.

Fifty Shades of Grey Listed Under Classics

Well, on the positive side, at least people will consider it a chore to read.

(Source: twitter.com)

CollegeHumor’s Favorite Funny Videos

Morgan Freeman Narrates 50 Shades of Grey

Get busy boning, or get busy dying.

(Source: youtube.com)