“50 Cent’s first pitch at the Mets, Pirates game was so bad that the Mets tried to sign him.”
He’s got the same accuracy of the people who shot him 9 times.
I hope you don’t plan on being productive for the rest of the day, because the internet is about to muck that up.
First things first, Jehovah’s Witnesses do not want people to be jerking it, especially deaf people. Probably because the risk of somebody walking in on them is even greater, and that’s just going to be awkward for everyone. (There’s no telling how many times Annie Sullivan walked in on Helen Keller mid-diddle…)
Can you match the lame lyric to the artist?
1) “I’m 5’5” but I can six nine”
2) “Mix that Goose with Malibu I call it ‘Malibooyah’”
3) "Spaghetti bolognese in the Polo Lounge"
4) "I be tossin’, enforcin’, my style is awesome / I’m causin more Family Feud’s than Richard Dawson"
5) ”Hey, this is my jam”
6) ”I giggle outside the booth; ain’t no joke inside”
7) ”I’m the definition of: half man, half drugs”
8) ”I beat the Pussy UP, UP, UP, UP, UP, UP, UP”
9) ”I love you like a fat kid love cake”
10) ”Hilton / Hilton / Bitch, I’m Paris Hilton (4x)”
Patrick Star is in a State of Permanent Shock [Click for more]
Spongebob’s best friend is shocked by everything, including the fact that his shocked-ness became a meme.
How’s that P.I.M.P. thing workin’ out for ya?
Banjoleles just changed the rap game.
Go shawty, it’s your classroom.
50 Cent Has Staring Contest with Cat [Click to animate]
Get rich or die nine times tryin’.
Every rapper’s got to have a nonsense syllable to fall back on sometime, so we’ve got 32 of the greats saying nothing whatsoever right here.
50 Cent Doesn’t Know What a Grapefruit Is.
Here’s a new preview from my standup special Dangerously Delicious. Download/stream the full hour for only $5 on http://azizansari.com.
We love this bit. And Aziz.
Even 50 has to do chores sometimes…
Real Life Twitter 2: Celebrity Edition - Dan shouts some celebrity tweets on the streets.
(Source: College Humor)