10 Things the NSA Knows About Me
1. I still say “I love you” to my mom.
2. I’ll only call a pizza place if it isn’t on Seamless.
3. I’ve accidentally said “I love you” to someone I’ve ordered a pizza from.
4. Restaurants on Seamless sometimes want verbal clarification of what I meant when I wrote “:-)” as a “special instruction.”
5. Any call I’ve made to someone that isn’t answering the phone at a pizza place or woman that gave birth to me only lasts long enough to make it look like they missed my call.
6. People who deliver pizza have a difficult time finding my apartment and often need directions.
7. I love trailing off as I sift through all of the crap my brain actually remembers to try and recall how to get to my apartment.
8. I won’t answer the phone if I don’t recognize the number and I haven’t ordered pizza.
9. I probably won’t answer the phone if I recognize the number.
10. I don’t love talking on the phone.