I worked at a popular franchise restaurant and came up with some of the greatest excuses known to man or woman for being late. Of the best was one day when I came in for a shift and had missed the 8 am meeting. The manager came to me and said “You’d better have a damned good reason for missing the meeting the morning.” I told him with a straight face ” Sir. I woke up this morning duct taped to a lawn chair. It took me to 9 to work out of the tape. I got here as soon as possible.” The guy never looked at me the same again.